Ryan Woerner

As you likely know if you watch a lot of Judge Judy or are a criminal, the unmistakable wood-on-wood clap that accompanies the pounding of a gavel is most often created with the intention of quieting a large crowd of unruly people, most often in a courtroom, as was the case today. Typically, it is successful. This was not the case today, despite the fact that the gentleman swinging the gavel was doing it quite ferociously.
Things often got unruly shortly before opening arguments kicked off, b...

Jon Shehan and the Marauders aren’t particularly familiar with the concepts of “losing streaks” or “sub .500 records.”
It’s not hard to see why—since the beginning of the 2013 season the Marauders have earned themselves an 83-36 record. When a team is winning 70 percent of the games they play, there just isn’t much time to spend dropping consecutive games and falling below .500. However, entering the weekend set with Pittsburg-Johnstown, the Marauders were just that.
“We didn’t ...

“Growing up, I always wanted to be a professional athlete,” said Marauders inside linebacker Reggie Slaton. “I had the occasional thought of maybe being a cop or firefighter but the infatuation with being able to do what I love for a career took over being able to get paid for it would just be a bonus.”
However, for at least a few years, Reggie took a break from football.
“Reggie started playing football at the age of 5,” said Reggie’s mom, Carla. “He played up until the 5th gra...

When the Marauders walked away from Bloomsburg having swept the Huskies Monday, they had quite a few people to be thankful for. Chas McCormick teed off thrice in Monday’s double-header, giving him five for the year. It was McCormick’s 30th straight game reaching base. Dan Neff and Tyler Orris each reached base six times. Brandon Miller and Jim McDade both earned wins in their starts. Rounding out the list of top performers of not only the double-header against Bloom, but also th...

As is often the case in the great game of basketball, one look at the box score told the story of the night for Aaron Bud and the Los Angeles Lakers.
And while some stories are jovial in nature, light in tone and intended for young audiences, others are not. Some are darker, and should only be told to very brave, very mature adults. The story that the box score told on this evening falls into the latter of the two categories; a story of an aging former superstar and a team whose fanbase had b...

As fall begins to yield to the throes of winter, the time we spend outdoors grows smaller and smaller, the blistering wind forcing us from our football fields, our playgrounds and our above ground post-Trump nuclear war bunkers to the safety and warmth of the indoors.
And where are there many homes that feature interior walls that block gusts of wind? Why yes, Lancaster Pennsylvania!
Known world-round for playing home to the Amish, sprawling farms and other things that I just can’t think of r...

Delete.
Delete.
Delete.
Del–uhh, mark as unread. Probably should open that one later, thought Lawrence.
At age 27 in calendar year 2019, the only people that still communicated via email with any sense of meaningful importance in Lawrence’s life were his co-workers, the utility companies that provided gas and sweet sweet electricity to his apartment, and Amazon – to provide order receipts. Most of these were promptly deleted, with the exception of those coming from his co-workers, which were ...